well it's been way too long! oops!

hey guys! Sorry it's been what, two weeks since I gave an update? I'm sorry!! Yeah, life has just kept on happening for me (for which I am still so thankful!!) and I've neglected my blog! Oopsie! Well, this one will be short and sweet since I'm pooped and I'm pretty sure my baby is in the process of waking up...

I've been working--still absolutely loving my job! However...today was the first day for me to be out on the floor by myself...and I must admit that it was slightly terrifying! I was SO good in our training room. And this was SO not our training room! I am really hoping that I get the hang of this job really soon...bc I TOTALLY need a bonus check in August...so that means for July I have to kick butt. And not just a little butt...we're talking big time booty! And I'm more unsure today after working about my job than I was Friday when I left...it's just confusing! But-I am going into this with the attitude that I WILL do it...so there. I will! =)

The kids actually went down tonight pretty good...which I am kinda afraid to even type for fear of it going bad! Bedtime has done nothing but get worse thse past couple weeks, so I'm praying for some resolve on that! I need them to just go to bed when I say, and sleep in their own beds. How flippin hard is that?? =)

So...I got to see my husband on Sunday. It was an extremely long drive, but it was worth it. Seeing him, even in the conditions we are having to live with right now, just makes my world spin a little bit better...maybe more right. I don't know how to describe it, but him being gone has probably been one of the lowest points in my life, and trust me, I've had several bad moments. This is just worse somehow--knowing that he is just right there, yet I have absolutely no control over what happens to him. Neither does he. The fate of our entire family rests in the hands of someone who doesn't even know us...and that is just SO scary. I know that he has to handle this business--no matter how hard you try to run from or hide from your past, it always finds you. He knows that too. I just want him back so I can be whole again, and have my life back. It's pretty sucky to have your very best friend, the love of your life, miles and miles away. But, just like with my job and the unknown there....this is going to be okay too. Bc I want it badly enough, so I know it will be. I just don't know how much longer it's going to take! Hurry up July 26!!! And I am praying for GOOD NEWS!

So...enough of the depressing crap! I'm ready to be happy again...so I think I'll find something to be thankful for. Yeah, I know there's too many to list! So...I think I'm still on the right track. I love my family so much...they are pretty much awesome and better than anybody else's! HAHA! Life is just totally crazy for me right now, but I'm just going to make the best of it and keep on truckin! Anyody else ever feel like that? That there's not much you can do but keep on going on--even when you have no clue what you're doing? Yeah, that's where I am now...oh well...good things are on the way! I just know it!

Until next time,